Weekend Roster Moves: Out in Left Field

Wait, so the hot competition this spring is between Ryan Church, who is capable of playing center but is slated to start in left, and Chris Snelling, for the left field job. Then centerfielder-designate Nookular goes down with a groin injury, and the solution to this problem is to bring up Rogearvin Bernadina from Potomac?

How does the solution not involve moving Church to center, starting Snelling in left, and then proceeding to hit the crap out of the ball with a solid, old-fashioned outfield? Granted, the loss of Nookular leaves the Nationals without a leadoff batter, as P.T. Bowden defines leadoff batter ("Lēd-off Bæt-er (n.): The skinniest batter on a team who also has some speed, without regard to ability to hit or take walks; preferably a batter more adept at hitting sacrifice bunts than line drives"). But if P.T. Bowden feels that strongly about leading off with a speedy bunter who doesn't walk, why not just bat the pitcher first and keep the strongest hitters in the outfield? Or Guzman? He's as much a leadoff batter as he is a number-two hitter. In fact, leading off would eliminate Six-Three's chances of hitting into a double play his first time up.

Issues of P.T. Bowden's expectations for a non-hitting leadoff batter aside, what confuses BallWonk is that a good-hitting but defensively average outfield of Snelling-Church-Kearns is exactly the kind of old-school, pre-Moneyball setup P.T. Bowden seems to have in his blood. How is it that the one time BW thinks the team should do it the stuck-in-the-mud traditional way and just fill the garden with hitters, P.T. Bowden is all about centerfield defense?

Other weekend developments:

1. BallWonk is very, very confused about first base. Travis Lee just up and retiring on account of lack of passion? Huh? Or was that more on the order of

P.T. Bowden: Travis, what would you say to starting the season with Columbus?

Travis Lee: I'd really rather not, sir.

P.T. Bowden: Sound like you don't have a real passion for the game anymore, Travis.

But if "passion" is what we want in a first baseman, then Young is probably the guy. No lack of passion there. Though BallWonk would not mind seeing Dmitri Lawrenceovich develop a passion for buying a larger glove.

As to Long John spending the last week and a half showing signs of continued arm weakness and then all but passing out from dehydration, BW doesn't know what to think. Is this trouble? With a capital T and that rhymes with D and that stands for team doctors? Injury-wise, Montreal/Washington has been the most snakebit team in the majors for about six years now. Are we somehow accidentally hiring only players with a CON score of 8 or less? Or is the constant drumbeat of nagging and often bizarre injuries a sign that maybe the Nationals need a better HMO? Are the rumors true that all of the medical students Reagan rescued from Grenada are now practicing physicians on the Nationals staff?